I finally saw the film "Julie and Julia" last night. I went into it with only the foggiest notion of the movie's content. Note to readers: do NOT see this movie on an empty stomach! You will be absolutely STARVING by the end!!
Despite the protests of my aforementioned empty stomach, I had a wonderful time out with my girlfriends, and even learned a few lessons along the way. For starters, I think the main lesson I took away from this film was to a)follow your dreams, even if it means taking a risk; and b)don't become a complete narcissist while doing so. That seems pretty obvious. However, for the aspiring blogger/writer, I see how narcissism could creep up on you, rearing its ugly head when you least suspect it. In short, point taken.
The other lesson I took away from the film was a bit more subtle. Julie, the main character, looked up to her hero, Julia. Nothing wrong with that. Most of us have people we admire or aspire to be more like. The lesson comes in this. Julie didn't just seem to look up to Julia. She loved her, practically worshiped her. At times, it seemed she wanted to be her; sometimes in an almost "Single White Female" kind of way. SPOILER ALERT: When her idol ultimately seemed, at best, annoyed by the fixation of her biggest fan, Julie was crushed. But then Julie's supportive husband reminded her that the important Julia wasn't the real Julia, it was the Julia in Julie's head. You follow?
You see, what really mattered was how Julie's idealized version of Julia helped her to become a better person. Thus, Julie was able to continue her quest and achieve her dream. Happiness all around! Perhaps, but I would beg to differ.
To be clear, I have nothing against looking up to admirable people, or striving to achieve one's goals. These can be worthy endeavors. However, to hold another human being in such high esteem that they can seemingly do no wrong is problematic at best and dangerous at worst. Our most noble human heroes will ultimately fail us. Then we are faced with two options. We can turn a blind eye to their failures and shortcomings, thus keeping them on their pedestal. Or, we can allow ourselves to be devastated, wallowing in regret and self-pity, and ultimately becoming hardened to trusting in others. Neither option strikes me as very appealing.
Yet, as much as we might want to argue that we would never go that far in our adoration, we have only to look at our news headlines (and our reactions to them) to see that it happens all the time. How many of us become offended or angry when a person or group appears to attack our favorite politician, religious leader, or even movie star? How many of us feel a twinge of almost personal wounding when we read that someone in the public eye we truly admired has fallen from grace? Is this not indicative of our human desire to worship, whether directed toward G-d, other humans, or material objects?
In the end, I would still heartily recommend this film. I'm glad I saw it. It's a delightful movie, and the actors give themselves completely to their characters, drawing us into their world. But oddly enough, the reason I'm most thankful that I saw this movie, was that it reminded me that only G-d is truly worthy of our worship.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Friday, August 21, 2009
A Fine Whine and the Art of Entitlement
I was listening to NPR's "Marketplace" yesterday, as I drove to meet my girlfriends for dinner. I didn't hear the entire show, but the topic seemed to be the economic recession and the effects of the economy on those whose wages have been cut.
Now I don't have a problem with anyone doing a news story on today's economy. After all, this is a topic that is on the minds of most people in our nation. Yet I was a bit bemused by the reporter's choice of people to interview.
The first person the reporter interviewed was a corporate CEO who had cut his own salary, as well as his employees' salaries, by 10%. He spoke of having to by a nice used car this year, instead of a new one. He chuckled about how his wife would insist on ordering an appetizer for her dinner instead of an entree whenever their family went out for dinner. He seemed to find all this "belt-tightening" in his home a bit of a lark, and found it cute that his wife was cutting back. I wonder what life is like for his employees. After all, their salaries were cut by the same amount, but I'm guessing they don't have nearly the amount of cushion in their budgets as the CEO.
The second person interviewed was a woman who worked for a major accounting firm in downtown Boston. Her husband worked in the corporate sphere downtown as well. They had never had children and had both recently experienced temporary pay cuts. She spoke of their lifestyle changes such as putting a little less in savings than they usually did, eating at home, making their own yogurt, and attempting to make their own cheese. She seemed beleaguered, and stated she couldn't wait until the end of summer when they would receive their full salaries again. Again, I can't help but wonder about the people who didn't make enough to have a savings in the first place. You know, those who buy generic cheese slices at the grocery store, because they can't even afford the tools and ingredients to make their own cheese? I doubt their pay cuts are only for the summer.
Yet, lest I sound like a whiner myself, I'm actually glad I heard this report. It caused me to look inward at my own sense of entitlement. How many times have I inwardly whined that I can't afford a better wardrobe or a monthly cleaning service? I admit this to my shame. My husband and I make it a point to teach our children how good they have it, and how many people in other parts of the world are truly destitute, without even the most basic necessities on a regular basis. And yet, here I sit, coveting my neighbor's new car.
It's funny, the things to which we believe we're entitled. As if by virtue of being human, we have a right to a certain standard of wealth or health. Are we entitled to anything, really? And what happens when we have competing entitlements? Who wins? I'm thinking of the situation in the news in Scotland, where the Libyan terrorist was released from prison because he has cancer and does not have much time left to live. Scotland claims it is humane to allow a terminally ill man to die at home. The families of those killed on the plane he bombed claim that there is no justice, because their relatives are dead, yet the perpetrator was released to a hero's welcome in his home country. Quite honestly, I can see both points. The merciful part of me can agree that human beings are entitled to die with dignity. However, the part of me that craves justice realizes that his victims were not given that courtesy, and that their families are entitled to retribution.
So who is in the right? I don't know. Life is complicated like that. But I believe that if we could put aside our own sense of entitlement (that whining voice inside us) and step into our adversary's shoes just for a moment, we would find a lot more common ground.
Now I don't have a problem with anyone doing a news story on today's economy. After all, this is a topic that is on the minds of most people in our nation. Yet I was a bit bemused by the reporter's choice of people to interview.
The first person the reporter interviewed was a corporate CEO who had cut his own salary, as well as his employees' salaries, by 10%. He spoke of having to by a nice used car this year, instead of a new one. He chuckled about how his wife would insist on ordering an appetizer for her dinner instead of an entree whenever their family went out for dinner. He seemed to find all this "belt-tightening" in his home a bit of a lark, and found it cute that his wife was cutting back. I wonder what life is like for his employees. After all, their salaries were cut by the same amount, but I'm guessing they don't have nearly the amount of cushion in their budgets as the CEO.
The second person interviewed was a woman who worked for a major accounting firm in downtown Boston. Her husband worked in the corporate sphere downtown as well. They had never had children and had both recently experienced temporary pay cuts. She spoke of their lifestyle changes such as putting a little less in savings than they usually did, eating at home, making their own yogurt, and attempting to make their own cheese. She seemed beleaguered, and stated she couldn't wait until the end of summer when they would receive their full salaries again. Again, I can't help but wonder about the people who didn't make enough to have a savings in the first place. You know, those who buy generic cheese slices at the grocery store, because they can't even afford the tools and ingredients to make their own cheese? I doubt their pay cuts are only for the summer.
Yet, lest I sound like a whiner myself, I'm actually glad I heard this report. It caused me to look inward at my own sense of entitlement. How many times have I inwardly whined that I can't afford a better wardrobe or a monthly cleaning service? I admit this to my shame. My husband and I make it a point to teach our children how good they have it, and how many people in other parts of the world are truly destitute, without even the most basic necessities on a regular basis. And yet, here I sit, coveting my neighbor's new car.
It's funny, the things to which we believe we're entitled. As if by virtue of being human, we have a right to a certain standard of wealth or health. Are we entitled to anything, really? And what happens when we have competing entitlements? Who wins? I'm thinking of the situation in the news in Scotland, where the Libyan terrorist was released from prison because he has cancer and does not have much time left to live. Scotland claims it is humane to allow a terminally ill man to die at home. The families of those killed on the plane he bombed claim that there is no justice, because their relatives are dead, yet the perpetrator was released to a hero's welcome in his home country. Quite honestly, I can see both points. The merciful part of me can agree that human beings are entitled to die with dignity. However, the part of me that craves justice realizes that his victims were not given that courtesy, and that their families are entitled to retribution.
So who is in the right? I don't know. Life is complicated like that. But I believe that if we could put aside our own sense of entitlement (that whining voice inside us) and step into our adversary's shoes just for a moment, we would find a lot more common ground.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
What's In A Name?
I really can’t believe the amount of time I spent agonizing over the name for this blog. I mean, after all, it’s just a blog, right? It’s one of a million other blogs out there on the web. Will anyone actually read it? Will anyone besides me ever even know that it exists?
And yet I spent precious time fretting over just the right name. Why is that? I’d like to think it’s because I’m a perfectionist as a writer; a true artist, if you will. However, I believe it goes much deeper than that. Just as our personal names are tied to our identities, my blog’s name is tied to my web persona. It defines who I am out there in the vast social sea that is the internet. People read a name and instantly form a concept in their minds of what a site/blog/person is all about.
This line of thinking leads me to ponder the many other names by which we try to define ourselves. We affix labels to ourselves and others that denote political preferences, religious (or non-religious) ideologies, professional achievements, and even familial roles. Obviously, for the sake of communication we must find concise terms to describe ourselves and those around us. But if they’re simply utilitarian descriptors, why do we become so attached? Why are we, as human beings, so passionate about choosing our own labels and rejecting those chosen for us? For example, note the subtle (and not so subtle!) nuances between “Pro-Life” and “Anti-Abortion”; “Democrat” and “Left Winger”, “Religious Right” and “Fundamentalist”, "At-Home-Mom" and "Housewife."
So how does this relate to me and my little blog? Well, I guess as naïve as it sounds, I wanted a name that would attract people, let them know who I am and what to expect. I am a woman, a wife, a mother. I am a Messianic Jewish person. I am a lover of art and literature, theater and dance, fine wines, coffee and chocolate. But how do I pack all that into one phrase, and manage to make it catchy?
That’s how I landed on the name “After Dinner Mintz.” In addition to the little play on words, it’s an invitation for anyone who’s willing to curl up at the end of the day with a nice glass of wine or a cup of hot tea and enter into a dialogue with me about current events, politics, religion, art, or even the mundane happenings of every day life. I hope you’ll join me and I hope it makes your journey in this world a little sweeter.
And yet I spent precious time fretting over just the right name. Why is that? I’d like to think it’s because I’m a perfectionist as a writer; a true artist, if you will. However, I believe it goes much deeper than that. Just as our personal names are tied to our identities, my blog’s name is tied to my web persona. It defines who I am out there in the vast social sea that is the internet. People read a name and instantly form a concept in their minds of what a site/blog/person is all about.
This line of thinking leads me to ponder the many other names by which we try to define ourselves. We affix labels to ourselves and others that denote political preferences, religious (or non-religious) ideologies, professional achievements, and even familial roles. Obviously, for the sake of communication we must find concise terms to describe ourselves and those around us. But if they’re simply utilitarian descriptors, why do we become so attached? Why are we, as human beings, so passionate about choosing our own labels and rejecting those chosen for us? For example, note the subtle (and not so subtle!) nuances between “Pro-Life” and “Anti-Abortion”; “Democrat” and “Left Winger”, “Religious Right” and “Fundamentalist”, "At-Home-Mom" and "Housewife."
So how does this relate to me and my little blog? Well, I guess as naïve as it sounds, I wanted a name that would attract people, let them know who I am and what to expect. I am a woman, a wife, a mother. I am a Messianic Jewish person. I am a lover of art and literature, theater and dance, fine wines, coffee and chocolate. But how do I pack all that into one phrase, and manage to make it catchy?
That’s how I landed on the name “After Dinner Mintz.” In addition to the little play on words, it’s an invitation for anyone who’s willing to curl up at the end of the day with a nice glass of wine or a cup of hot tea and enter into a dialogue with me about current events, politics, religion, art, or even the mundane happenings of every day life. I hope you’ll join me and I hope it makes your journey in this world a little sweeter.
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